Monday, October 19, 2009

In the train station, Jarrett reads a story about a thrifty Giraffe in Eastern Europe. He was not only a Shaman, but he also owned a country store. One day, a Crocodile businessman visited the Giraffe Shaman’s country store before a long journey into Asia Minor. The crocodile businessman wished to acquire supplies and rations for his trip, but the Giraffe Shaman’s country store was empty. The Giraffe Shaman said that he had no supplies but that he too, would be embarking on a long journey in a few days and that he could meet the Crocodile Businessman with food and rations before he went hungry. The Crocodile Businessman skeptically left on his journey, keeping a vague faith in the Giraffe Shaman. However, after a few days, it seemed that the Giraffe Shaman had not moved a hoof from behind the counter of his country store. Then, a Laodicean Ox with all of the necessary supplies arrived from Asia Minor. The Ox said, “I felt your thoughts, great Giraffe Shaman, and I set off to your village. On my journey, I ran into a villager from your town who was fresh out of rations.” Thus, the shaman’s journey was not physical at all, but mental, as he arranged for the paths of the supply cart of the Laodicean Ox and the Crocodile Businessman to intersect so conveniently on the same path. Thus, the lesson of thoughts sent from one individual to another, across space and time is learned.

There’s a couple across from him, both dressed in business casual clothing. They seem to share the nervous confidence of a budding romance with their laughter and intentionally deep expressions. This makes him nauseous. He imagines in two or three months, they’ll be in the intoxicated guile of a dying relationship, with the man trying to kiss the woman only to be turned away by the confidence of her physical beauty. This makes him feel better. He sees an older woman who begins to cry and he thinks, this is the depression and desperation of dying physical beauty; of rejection. She is alone. I am alone too, he thinks. Jarrett hates when his thoughts turn towards relationships, because they are so transparent, like looking through a one sided mirror at a car crash in slow motion. He hates how it’s a game of vulnerability. He hates how exhausting it is to not be able to stop thinking about one person. He doesn’t want to be “emo” but also doesn’t want to become so cynical. He began looking at horoscopes, and at one time, Jarrett actually thought he could record in a journal his theories on all of his favorite emo love songs, indicating both partners in the love song as belonging to a specific zodiac sign.